Victoria Beckham has taken the saying “if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em” to heart by introducing dresses for fatties in her fashion line. Grazia reports that Victoria is finally embracing that #HOTBUTTEREDTOAST life, if not for herself, then for her clients, declaring “women today want to look healthy, and curvy. They want to have some boobs – and a bum.“Victoria has launched a capsule collection for the ladies who actually lunch called VB Body which features what she calls the “ultimate sucky-sucky dress,” which probably made her husband David Beckham perk up for a second until he realized it doesn’t come with built-in knee pads, it’s just a bodycon dress that’s supposed to suck in all that meat you’re supposedly flaunting.
Victoria says she was inspired to create the collection by watching “lot of really curvy women in Miami“wearing next to nothing”really own it,“so she came up with a convoluted roundabout way of telling them to cover that shit up! Grazia reports:
‘Every woman wants a nice, round, curvy bottom, right?’ she says. ‘For that, you need a really tight knit that nips you in at the waist and holds you in all the right places.
You need fully fashioned details, considered and perfectly placed to create a really flattering silhouette. That’s how you make what I call the ultimate sucky-sucky dress.’
‘It’s an old-fashioned attitude, wanting to be really thin,’ Victoria adds. ‘I think women today want to look healthy, and curvy. They want to have some boobs – and a bum.’ On her ring finger, a diamond the size of a Jelly Baby catches the light as she squeezes her imaginary peach for emphasis. ‘The curvier you are, the better my VB Body dresses look.’
Here’s Posh proving her point in her one-shoulder mini-dress ($810), presumably in the smallest size available (size range is UK 00-6) considering she’s practically swimming in it. Which, it does kind of make sense since it looks like it’s made of neoprene the way it’s bunching up on her.
She’s going to throw her back out Booty Tooching like that. Now compare Victoria’s look to that of the only picture I can find anywhere on the internet of a full-sized model wearing VB Body. The models wearing these dresses on her website are all card-carrying members of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee and the Flat Ass Society.
Now Posh isn’t about to start dressing her salad leaf or anything crazy like that, but she has begun lifting a few light weights in an effort to sell the idea that she could, if she wanted to, under duress, lift whole milk latte to her lips.
Dressed all in black, with thigh-high Balenciaga stiletto stocking boots under a long split skirt and silk blouse from her own collection, Victoria appears as slender as ever. When I point this out, she shrugs. ‘It’s not about being a certain size. It’s about knowing who you are and being happy with who you are. I have found my own balance between wanting to have fun and being disciplined about eating healthily and working out. When you’re younger you fight against that balance, but through being older I’ve reached a place where I know what that balance looks like. I just know what works for me.’
But she also wants ‘as good a bottom as I can get’ – to which end, she’s been doing a batch of squats every morning.
‘I’ve always been a bit scared of weights, but it turns out I love them. I’ve even got those special gloves to wear! It’s good to switch things up and keep your body guessing. I’ve got so much more muscle tone now,’ she says.
Much like her new daughter-in-law Nicola Peltz who shares her love of Jelly Baby-sized diamonds, I bet a lot of that muscle tone is in THAT FINGER.
Peak: Aurore Marechal/ABACA/INSTARimages.com